Lindsey R. Loucks

Author of Romance and Other Scary Things

My First Published Short Story and Number Three In the Worst Email Contest

Work Literary Magazine published my short story Alpha Female Office Wolf! I’m so excited! You can click on the title if you’d like to read it.


I just might be the only person who finds these horrible emails funny, but here is the number three worst email of 2000. Taken from: Worst e-mail contest winners. (2000, January 25). TechRepublic.

Situation: A customer who complained about software received this reply from the company’s “CustomerCare” department.

Dear ,
What probleme you refering to? We no problem have with window 98 or toher system. We do not have any problemsrunning on these operating system. None of our customer have such problem. What you talking about?

Thank You, “ CustomerCare”

Wow. That’s customer care? We big problem have with customer care. What you talking about?


  1. Oh, Lord, that’s like my writing the last few days. Like the brain slug is attached firmly to my scalp 🙂

  2. Yeeey, Lindsey! Congrats on getting teh published!
    Actually, I found this e-mail funny – sounds like someone put the German handy book through google translator :p

  3. Mysti – perhaps dumping some salt over your head will get rid of the slug! 😉

    Stef – you could be right about the Google translator! And thank you!

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